A Little Bit of Rope

Bournemouth Beach

At 13, Kian is starting to become ever more independent and often doesn’t want to join us on days out with the little ones, even though he has a fab time when we are there.

The trouble is, if I let him stay at home you can guarantee that he won’t move from the Xbox or laptop so I normally end up insisting he comes along.

Hubby and I were always out as kids and were always outside come rain or shine.  I have fond memories of exploring my local area, playing with friends in the park and heading into town on the train, so it has been frustrating watching Kian want to stay at home and play games online with his friends.

I know if is their way of playing these days and I can hear him chatting and laughing on his headset whilst building the most amazing worlds on Minecraft, but it just isn’t the same as going out and about with your friends.

This weekend we got the question we were hoping for and dreading all at the same time!

Mum, can I go the beach with my friends?

As a parent, all the dangers suddenly leap in to your mind and then the realisation that your baby is growing up……and fast!

He was questioned (not in a Spanish inquisition type way) about who he was going with and what they planned to do. Thankfully his friends are quite a sensible bunch so I was happy that he would be in a good group.  He wanted a lift into Bournemouth, which I was happy to do and had arranged to meet his friends outside the Oceanarium.  Pretty organised for a group of 13 year old boys!

On the morning of his day out, not only was he up on time but he had sensibly packed his bag with food, a towel and swimming shorts.  The only thing I had to add was sunscreen and I made sure he had coated himself before we left.

I dropped him off and he was gone.

I got a text to let me know he had found his friends ok and I didn’t hear from him again until he wanted to be picked up.

He had a wonderful time!

Free from parental restrictions and small siblings demanding attention he got to do what he wanted to do.  I got tales of football on the beach, swimming in the rather chilly sea and an amazing new game using a Waboba ball (think bouncy ball you use on water) and the obligatory ice cream.

He even re-applied sunscreen, although it does appear that 13 year old boys won’t ask each other for help as he has a line of sunburn just below his shoulders as he couldn’t quite reach…………next time I will do his back before he goes.

 

24 thoughts on “A Little Bit of Rope

  1. Lovely post. Sounds like he was very organised for his day out! It must be reassuring that you can let him go out with his friends again in the future. My son doesn’t always want to come out with us either.
    Sarah MumofThree World recently posted…Weston-super-MareMy Profile

  2. As he is 13 now there will be more and more days like this… you slowly get used to it 😉
    agatapokutycka recently posted…Alphabet Project | B is for BunkMy Profile

  3. Sarah Bailey says:

    It sounds like he had an amazing time, I remember wanting to grow up so soon at that age and be independent. x
    Sarah Bailey recently posted…Like Love Loathe #12My Profile

  4. Charly Dove says:

    Oh Kara he must have been beside himself with excitement! Must have been hard to let him go although he sounds super sensible which is brilliant 🙂
    Charly Dove recently posted…Photos from Chilworth Gunpowder MillMy Profile

  5. Keri-Anne says:

    He sounds like such a sensible boy which is so rare. You must be so proud of how he has grown up! I am dreading these days when i have to let them go. x
    Keri-Anne recently posted…Keeping their flowersMy Profile

  6. Sara-Jayne says:

    I’ll bet he was so excited… I still remember when I was 13 and allowed to go to town with my best friend shopping alone. It was amazing for me. It’s so hard to let go though, I am terrified for when our time comes 🙁
    Sara-Jayne recently posted…Praying the Contractions Stay Away… Britmums 2014.My Profile

  7. well done you, it must be so hard to give them their freedom but it’s so important isn’ it! x
    Fritha Strickland recently posted…me and youMy Profile

  8. Kizzy says:

    We have the same problem with our 13 year old and he has started meeting his mates over the past few years but in town as we have no beach near us! Glad he enjoyed it
    Kizzy recently posted…Sun-day – Weekend in PicturesMy Profile

  9. Globalmouse says:

    ok, this sounds wonderful and he sounds like a really sensible, lovely boy. But I have to be honest, it makes me feel a little sick in my stomach. The idea of my eldest going off on his own and waiting for the text to arrive to say he’s ready to come home – I would spend the whole time pacing the floor. I’m really impressed by how you’ve been able to give him the time and space to do this as obviously it’s an inevitable step of spreading those wings…I only hope I’ll be as great as this when it’s my turn to wave my oldest off!!
    Globalmouse recently posted…What my children say about…P&O cruise to Italy & CroatiaMy Profile

  10. It sounds like he had a great time. I know what you’re going through as my eldest is 15. It’s really hard when they start going out on their own. The first time my daughter went to a pop concert in London with her friends I felt literally sick until she was safely home!
    Mums do travel recently posted…How to enjoy a city break with kidsMy Profile

  11. How lovely that he wants to go to the beach with his friends – I hope my Austin will be wanting to do similarly healthy things when he reaches this age! And good on you for allowing him out for the day. I bet I’d have been terrified too, but it sounds as though it was a great thing for him to have done.
    Nell@PigeonPairandMe.com recently posted…Review: Monski Mouse Baby Disco Dance HallMy Profile

  12. jenny says:

    I’m so glad this is a long way off for me as I don’t think I could cope!
    jenny recently posted…What I’m reading: Little Quilts by Sarah Fielke & Amy LobsigerMy Profile

  13. I have exactly the same memories as a child – playing outside till late, exploring the area with friends and all sorts of things. When I see my 5 yrs old brother spending his free time with tablet or xbox games I’m dissapointed how much he’s missing out!
    Sylvia @ Happiness is homemade recently posted…Sardine spaghetti / Spaghetti z sardynkamiMy Profile

  14. Such a big step, I am glad I have got years to go before this happens. Glad he had fun x
    You Baby Me Mummy recently posted…While you were sleepingMy Profile

  15. Victoria says:

    i think its the age when they are starting to be more independent, i think since 14 y.o my nephew stopped coming to see us as frequent as he used to and now at 16 he has pasties with mates
    Victoria recently posted…Baby Shower!My Profile

  16. Good for you. I believe in giving my boys as much freedom as I can. I want them to grow up to be good sensible men and think that this is a way to encourage them to do so
    Jen aka The Mad House recently posted…A weekend in the gardenMy Profile

  17. How wonderful – we have this similar issue with my 16 yr old. His year group at school are v widespread and no one hangs out locally – which is kind of good… but not so good either when it means they all meet up online :S As you say, a virtual world is hardly the same!
    Kate Thompson recently posted…Climbing EverestMy Profile

  18. lisa prince says:

    i would love to go to rome, my husband has mentioned it once the children have flown the nest x

  19. Michelle says:

    The first time I let my son out on his own – oh how the panic set in! My mum always said the hardest part about being a parent is letting your kids grow wings and fly – she was right!! Sounds like he had a fab time!
    Michelle recently posted…Tea For Two Paper Decorations made with Cricut Explore! #ExcitedToExploreMy Profile

  20. My son is a few years older. Last year he went on a hike for miles with his friends in the 80 degree heat. I was worried about him but he was the only one who use sunscreen!
    mellissa williams recently posted…21 DiamondsMy Profile

  21. PinkOddy says:

    He is such a wonderful lad I am sure he is very sensible (see I had good first impressions of him). It is nice that you have a beach nearby encouraging him out but I can see how worrying that is all at the same time.
    PinkOddy recently posted…What the hell is happening down there? Hello? Is someone going to answer me? #MotivationalMondayMy Profile

  22. Ah, bless him! Sounds like he loved the independence and had a great time. I’m not at this stage yet but I imagine I will be the kind of parent who will worry constantly!!
    Donna @OrdCyclingGirl recently posted…Aviva stress less challengeMy Profile

  23. Louisa says:

    I have exactly the same with my teenage son! We were constantly suggesting he turned off his consoles and went out with friends. He took our advice and now we have the opposite problem; he’s never in! It’s great that they are outside and enjoying themselves.
    Louisa recently posted…Making an outdoor blackboardMy Profile

  24. Lucie Aiston says:

    Awww how lovely for him! My daughter is 11 (and a half) and will be starting secondary school in September!! I know I will need to loosen the apron strings at some point but i hate the idea! 🙁 xx
    Lucie Aiston recently posted…Silent Sunday – 18th May 2014My Profile

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