How do you know what you want when you put everyone and everything else in your life first? If you are saying yes to more overtime at work, if you are chaperoning school trips and being there morning and evening for school drop off and pick up, when do you say yes to yourself?
There has to be a moment in life that you stop saying yes to every single person around you and you start asking yourself what you want. It doesn’t make you selfish, a bad person or a bad mother to focus on your own self-care. It doesn’t make you anything other than smart! Looking out for yourself will keep you healthy, and while you’re Googling life hacks for a happier menopause and learning how to make yourself feel as healthy as possible is a good start. However, you need to think about how you can finally put your health and your happiness before everyone else in your life – at least once a week. With this in mind, we’ve got four steps for you to put yourself first for once.
- You say yes all the time, right? Well, it’s time to say no. people know you will be there for them, which is lovely, but if you are there for other people at the expense of your mental and physical health? That’s not okay. You need to learn to say no and stop people-pleasing for a change. And don’t feel guilty about it!
- Ask for help from your doctor, your partner and even your kids. If you have older teenagers around while you are going through health changes, kick them into stepping up and taking some responsibility for their own cleaning up and cooking. There is nothing wrong with them learning how to take care of themselves – you have to take care of yourself.
- Learn what you like for once! You may have deferred to everyone else for activities and holidays, and you may have toughened it out when you’ve had the flu and waited on everyone else when they suffer – but now it’s time to get in touch with yourself. You need to learn what you like and what you don’t like, and then start speaking up for yourself. When you’re sick, or you’re struggling, you can say that you are taking time to rest and get well!
- Put your happiness ahead of others – at least once in a while. Going through menopause teaches you that a part of your life is over. But that doesn’t mean that your WHOLE life is over. Sure, you can’t have more kids, but your kids are now grown and you may be preparing for grandchildren. It doesn’t mean that you have to become a babysitter 24/7 for them – pick your own enjoyment. Book a cruise, go and see the world. It’s time to put your happiness before someone else’s for once.
Self-care is so important, no matter your age. Put yourself in the front seat at least once and you’ll learn how much you love to do it!